Wednesday, January 8, 2014

New Year, New Journey

I decided to participate in the oneword365 challenge this year.
It took a while, but I chose the word "trust"
This photograph is from my first contribution to the Brave Girl Community website.
I'll be a regular contributor there. "All for His Glory" is a common theme among us "Brave Girls". :)

That is one of the main things God is showing me as I pursue Him this year.
It's not about Tammy.
You'd think that being a parent to grade-schoolers, pre-schoolers and toddlers, and trying to teach them that the world doesn't revolve around them, that I'd have grasped that it doesn't revolve around me either.
You'd think so.

Really though? The verse stating, "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit but in humility consider others better than yourselves" is really burning a hole in my head right now. (Philippians 2:3)

How do I trust God? By realizing that I was made in His image.
A mini-me...reminds us of the "Me", the Great "I AM", should cause our minds to be directed to the source.
That He created us to further His name, His glory, His greatness.
We don't matter in the sense of our own achievements (Paul had a great comparison of our righteousness...for a modern day understanding, use the Message translation).
What matters is that through us, the Creator of the Entire Universe is healing people (physically, mentally, socially, emotionally and spiritually) and transforming their lives into unselfish beings further carrying on His work. (Pay it Forward on a grander scale that we can fathom)

"If you do it unto the least of these, you have done it unto me." (Matthew 25)

As I wrote my "blog" for the Brave Girl site, the most impressing thought was our pursuit of fulfillment. God gave me a very clear thought and I even got to share it in a discussion of the "Wife After God" devotional through the Unveiled Wife ministry!
She quoted it later in the Facebook event as we're going through it the entire month of January.
We were discussing feeling worthy of God's love and why we don't feel worthy.
Here is God's truth:
"Realize that your spouse, your children, their performance will never fill you and your disappointment of unmet expectations will further your emptiness. Only God can fill the longings for acceptance that daily hit us like hunger pains!" 

On Sunday as I was driving home from church, I began to write a song. I've decided to share it with you, though I'm not polished in my recording. I literally recorded an hour after writing it and didn't have my words or music memorized, so I mess up in the middle.
God's been prompting me that I need to stop presenting a fake, "perfect" image of myself. That there will be times I'm polished and times I'm not and that all those times, I'm still His representative.

Lyrics begin with verse 1: "I'm not worthy, but I'm willing. You are calling and forgiving. You are leading, I will follow you." (you'll have to watch the video to hear it and the rest of the words)

So, I'd love your feedback.

This year, I'm hoping to see a transformation.
Way back almost 2 years ago we were given an index card in a Bible study and challenged to write "The desires of my heart. What and who do I want to be?"
That has been in my Bible, notebook, purse, just taking up space until recently. I didn't have a goal, didn't know what I wanted.
I want something BIG. Something God-sized. Something I can't have without Him.

Here's what I wrote:
I desire to truly want only God to be glorified. 
I desire to have no selfish motive for my use of gifts.
That I would want to use my opportunities for His glory and the need for any praise or affirmation other than His would ebb into nothingness. ~Jan 4, 2014~

Other blogs/devotionals that have inspired me and led me to these thoughts recently have come from the Proverbs 31 ministry.


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